I seem to remember shopping for jeans in my spare time before I transitioned. Scoot into the store....find my size in that huge wall rack...pay for my new pants and disappear into the crowd. That is no longer the case. It is getting kinda cool so I decided it was time to actually wear pants once in a while. So there I go to the mall to but myself a pair of jeans.
Simple right. Not so fast girlfriend. As I wander around about an acre of jeans I'm confronted first with exactly what kind of jeans I want. First do I want low rise, mid rise, below the waist, at the waist, above the waist...mmmmm....geeesh. When I finally decide on the waist I have to decide on a leg style and inseam. Am I going to wear these with cute ballet flats or sexy strappy heels. Do I want pure denim or do I want some Lycra for stretch.
I finally decide upon like four pairs I have to have (also a really good excuse to shop for shoes and tops) I start trying on jeans. It seems NOBODY makes jeans in ant consistent sizing. I tried on about a thousand different pairs of jeans to find the four pair that fit right, make my butt look right and fall to the right length for my intended shoe selections. Wow....it's a good thing I like to shop.
Maybe next time I'll have time to tell everyone about the search for the perfect ballet flats and finding some really great tops. Can you say "Victoria Secret" ....I love that store...and my new Angel Club card.
Tuesday, November 20, 2007
Thursday, November 8, 2007
It's freezing outside
The past week here the temperature has dropped all the way into the fifties. I know, I know, but I am in California. Anyway I have found that I am now getting really cold when before I was still comfortable. Apparently this is one of the effects of the hormones...the price for soft skin. In a cruel twist of fate I have a dresser full of gorgeous lingerie and I find myself wearing big fuzzy clothing trying to stay warm. Oh well summer will be back....I hope.
Sunday, October 28, 2007
Girl Talk...Oh My
Earlier this week I was weak and gave into yet another invitation from an old boyfriend living in Las Vegas. Now he really was never an actual boyfriend, more of a semi regular sex partner. Anyway since Southern California was on fire, I decided to get out of town and visit my friend. I had a great couple of days with him and his friends and really was kinda bummed having to leave. Well I made it back to work for Friday and by then I started feeling kinda guilty. I am supposed to be a woman now and I was questioning my decision to have meaningless sex for the sake of having sex. When I got to work the gals immediately set upon my with the third degree. It amazes me that women share EVERY detail of their lives with one another. I tried to leave it at "yes we had sex", but they were relentless asking for unbelievable details. Sorry Lawrence, but my friends now know every thing about you.
I wasn't sure how they would treat me after I revealed such intimate details, but we actually seem to be getting closer as friends. Who knew. On the bright side I don't feel bad about my sexual needs and have planned a weekend trip to my friends home next weekend. This time I am going to stay at his home and see how our relationship develops. Should make for some long discussions in the lunch room.
I wasn't sure how they would treat me after I revealed such intimate details, but we actually seem to be getting closer as friends. Who knew. On the bright side I don't feel bad about my sexual needs and have planned a weekend trip to my friends home next weekend. This time I am going to stay at his home and see how our relationship develops. Should make for some long discussions in the lunch room.
Monday, October 22, 2007
Gender Changes and Oil Changes
So here I am on Saturday with my car due for service. Seems simple huh. Not so fast. I wanted to go shopping at the local mall while my car being serviced so I took it to an oil change place right across the street from the mall. I leave the car with the goober asking simply for an oil change.
I walk across the street and start cruising the mall. After spending a months salary at the Brighton store ( another store I love) I hit the Macy's and Nordstrom looking for that special skirt. Yeah right, like I'll actually find it, I have lunch at the Nordstrom cafe.
I walk back to the lube joint with my new purses (don't ask) and find that my car is not finished yet. Ugggghhhh. The guy there then starts to explain to me that my car needs all kind of fluid changes and services that will only add hundreds to the bill. This guy is talking to me like I'm an idiot, but it takes me several minutes to figure out why. He is talking to a chick for crying out loud so I must be stupid right. Oh well, I guess I should expect this, all my gg sisters have been living with it their entire lives.
When I put the situation in perspective, I guess I should feel sorry for the dummy. I get to play dumb and still know what really happening with my car. It was worth the aggravation when I got to explain that the "expired" lube in the car's rear end was actually Royal Purple synthetic that was only six months old. The look on their faces was actually kinda funny.
Anyway I'm carrying my stuff in a brand new Brighton purse today. It's been the topic of discussion with every woman at the office. Unfortunately they didn't notice my new shoes.
I walk across the street and start cruising the mall. After spending a months salary at the Brighton store ( another store I love) I hit the Macy's and Nordstrom looking for that special skirt. Yeah right, like I'll actually find it, I have lunch at the Nordstrom cafe.
I walk back to the lube joint with my new purses (don't ask) and find that my car is not finished yet. Ugggghhhh. The guy there then starts to explain to me that my car needs all kind of fluid changes and services that will only add hundreds to the bill. This guy is talking to me like I'm an idiot, but it takes me several minutes to figure out why. He is talking to a chick for crying out loud so I must be stupid right. Oh well, I guess I should expect this, all my gg sisters have been living with it their entire lives.
When I put the situation in perspective, I guess I should feel sorry for the dummy. I get to play dumb and still know what really happening with my car. It was worth the aggravation when I got to explain that the "expired" lube in the car's rear end was actually Royal Purple synthetic that was only six months old. The look on their faces was actually kinda funny.
Anyway I'm carrying my stuff in a brand new Brighton purse today. It's been the topic of discussion with every woman at the office. Unfortunately they didn't notice my new shoes.
Friday, October 19, 2007
High Heels and Sports Bars
As I promised I am writing about my first real social outing as Des. Last week one of my coworkers invited me to watch the USC game with a group of her friends at a local sports bar. She was quick to explain that they were going there to flirt with the guys and that they really did not care about the game. She did point out that everyone there would be a USC fan though. Naturally with a closet full of new clothes I had to jump at the invite.
Saturday morning I got up and spent most of the morning worrying about everything. (which now is pretty much limited to what I'm wearing) For the record I selected a pair of straight leg jeans, a red halter top and gold high heel sandals. Kinda USC colors right.
I drove to her apartment and we drove to the bar together. When we met her friends I was relieved to find that nobody knew me. She swore to me that she did not tell any of them about me so I was just one of the girls. I quickly found out that the group was actually about 90% men and that they were USC FANATICS.
I had a really great time and got to try out my new feminine flirting abilities. Turns out that all a girl needs to do is look at a guy and try not to drool on herself. This was the first time I have been in a social situation with men who did not now about me and I was really having fun with it. i made me friend confirm my story that I had a serious relationship so I had an easy out if I got in over my head flirting. Several guys actually gave me their phone numbers so I must not be too bad at this stuff.
By the way, I'm actually an Arizona fan.
til next time.
Saturday morning I got up and spent most of the morning worrying about everything. (which now is pretty much limited to what I'm wearing) For the record I selected a pair of straight leg jeans, a red halter top and gold high heel sandals. Kinda USC colors right.
I drove to her apartment and we drove to the bar together. When we met her friends I was relieved to find that nobody knew me. She swore to me that she did not tell any of them about me so I was just one of the girls. I quickly found out that the group was actually about 90% men and that they were USC FANATICS.
I had a really great time and got to try out my new feminine flirting abilities. Turns out that all a girl needs to do is look at a guy and try not to drool on herself. This was the first time I have been in a social situation with men who did not now about me and I was really having fun with it. i made me friend confirm my story that I had a serious relationship so I had an easy out if I got in over my head flirting. Several guys actually gave me their phone numbers so I must not be too bad at this stuff.
By the way, I'm actually an Arizona fan.
til next time.
Thursday, October 18, 2007
Not so Casual Friday
I have been so busy I have not had time to post anything. I am trying to make time to catch up...really I am.
One of my many social goofs so far has been casual Friday at the office. With a closet full of brand new clothes it does not seem like I can err here, but I guess I did. On Friday morning I'm looking in my closet and decide on a really cute top, a knee length skirt and these realllly cute ballet flats. ( I know.....no heels????)
Any way I get to work thinking I'm pretty casual and pretty cute as well. Apparently I overdressed for casual Friday. The other women are all wearing jeans and sneakers so I get the "look" AND the "talking to". Who knew. Next Friday it's all about jeans so I fit in.
Just another growing pain as I adapt to my new me.
My next post I'll cover my visit to a sports bar with a group from work last Saturday. At least I didn't mess up the outfit that day.
One of my many social goofs so far has been casual Friday at the office. With a closet full of brand new clothes it does not seem like I can err here, but I guess I did. On Friday morning I'm looking in my closet and decide on a really cute top, a knee length skirt and these realllly cute ballet flats. ( I know.....no heels????)
Any way I get to work thinking I'm pretty casual and pretty cute as well. Apparently I overdressed for casual Friday. The other women are all wearing jeans and sneakers so I get the "look" AND the "talking to". Who knew. Next Friday it's all about jeans so I fit in.
Just another growing pain as I adapt to my new me.
My next post I'll cover my visit to a sports bar with a group from work last Saturday. At least I didn't mess up the outfit that day.
Tuesday, October 9, 2007
Stretching my plastic
Well I spent most of the weekend shopping my butt off. It's amazing how much stuff you need. I have been dressing for a long time and thought I had everything I would need.......boy was I ever wrong. Going out once in a while is nothing like having to get up every morning and get dressed...not that Im complaining.
I spent a whole day in Macy's and Nordstrom buying clothes for work. Dresses, suits, skirts, blouses and best of all......SHOES. I just had to visit Victoria's Secret....I love that place. Not to mention an afternoon at the MAC store. After all the shopping I had my eyebrows waxed and finally got some real acryllic nails.
I still cannot believe I am actually living this.
I spent a whole day in Macy's and Nordstrom buying clothes for work. Dresses, suits, skirts, blouses and best of all......SHOES. I just had to visit Victoria's Secret....I love that place. Not to mention an afternoon at the MAC store. After all the shopping I had my eyebrows waxed and finally got some real acryllic nails.
I still cannot believe I am actually living this.
Monday, October 8, 2007
My first days
So much is happening right now I just don't know where to start. I guess I'll start with my first days at work. Going to work seems like such a boring thing, but I am experiencing a whole new world. I decided to stop at a different Starbucks than I normally do just to see how I got treated. When I walked in I felt like everyone was staring at me..amd maybe they were, but the barrista called ma ma'am. Now most women get defensive at that, but I was actually taken as a woman....wooohoooo.
I'll post more later, but believe me I am having the time of my life.....even if I flattened the numbers on my credit cards shopping over the weekend.
I'll post more later, but believe me I am having the time of my life.....even if I flattened the numbers on my credit cards shopping over the weekend.
Friday, October 5, 2007
My life until now
I have known that I was transgendered for a long time. Like most others I continued to live and work as a male, marrying and tryingto be "normal". For a long time I would dress in women's clothing in secret and venturing out when the opportunity presented itself.
When my wife discovered Desire she tried to be understanding and we actually got along better in some ways. She finally realized she was missing a husband and we separated. As a newly single person I began dressing almost all the time until going to work was my only male time. Over time I grew my hair long and lost alot of weight.
I started wearing lingerie under my clothes to work and continued to be more feminine even when I was male. Last week I finally made a commitment to be female. Amazingly my employer has been fairly open minded and has allowed m eto continue working as Des. My first day in my new life was yesterday, October 4, 2007. I have adopted this as my rebirthday. Feel free to wish me a happy birthday.
When my wife discovered Desire she tried to be understanding and we actually got along better in some ways. She finally realized she was missing a husband and we separated. As a newly single person I began dressing almost all the time until going to work was my only male time. Over time I grew my hair long and lost alot of weight.
I started wearing lingerie under my clothes to work and continued to be more feminine even when I was male. Last week I finally made a commitment to be female. Amazingly my employer has been fairly open minded and has allowed m eto continue working as Des. My first day in my new life was yesterday, October 4, 2007. I have adopted this as my rebirthday. Feel free to wish me a happy birthday.
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